I have a confession to make.

Jeeni Blog

Helping the next generation of talent to build a global fanbase

I have a confession to make.

Jeeni has returned to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “Day 5 and we have reached 98% of our 100K target". If you want to see our pitch click HERE.

Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he's agreed to share his work with all our members. He's a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his website www.melcroucher.net. Here's one of Mel's latest!

I have a confession to make. I have been pimping a young model, and I confess my shame. My pimping is the result of a moment of weakness. I’ve had models before, and I understand their capricious nature. One moment they are willing to perform across my desk, and the next they freeze and refuse to let me do what I want to do. But it has not been any fantasy performance that’s got me hooked, it has been the fantasy looks. I was bored. I wanted colour. I wanted make-up. I wanted dazzle and glitter. I wanted tribal tattoos, hot bubbles, glowing tubes and a whirling fan-dance. Forgive me, but I’ve pimped my computer.

In 1909, Henry Ford declared, “I will build a motor car for the great multitude. It will be constructed of the best materials, by the best men to be hired, after the best designs that modern engineering can devise. And no man making a good salary will be unable to own one.” He then added his famous line, “The customer can have his car painted any colour he wants as long as it’s black.” And so they were. Painted black. When I was young, cars were still mostly black, apart from the odd spot of lipstick around the exhaust pipes of those used in suicide pacts. As for computer manufacturers, they all followed Henry Ford’s marketing strategy for half a century. Except their colour of choice was not black, but the sort of beige favoured by dead maggots. The exception was the ZX Spectrum which was black, but the keyboard really was made of dead maggots. Apart from that aberration, beige was the colour. In fact the beige box came to be used as a term of derision for desktops, implying dated, boring specifications.

For example, IBM's early desktop computers were not only very beige indeed, but also very box-shaped indeed, and most PC clone manufacturers followed suit. As IBM and its imitators came to dominate the industry, beige boxes became the unquestioned norm for boring desktop computer design. Even early Apple Macs were beige boxes, until Apple took the revolutionary step in 1987 of switching to the even more boring shade of Chicken Poo By Moonlight. Not long after, equally boring videogame consoles took over the world, until there were so many revolting grey Nintendos and Segas and Playstations and Gameboys, that they had to be transported across deep space to be turned into landfill on distant moons. Meanwhile all Earthbound computers were still fifty shades of grey, until one day Apple changed everything.I remember the shock when their 1988 iMacs were launched. Suddenly we had a choice of computers that looked like see-through giant jellybabies, in a range of five neon colours called gangrene, monkeybum, impetigo, barbie and mince. And that was the end of the adult era in electronics, as a collective madness took over computer marketing. Now users are persuaded to buy machines not for what they do in the adult world, but for their infantile appearance. Users who are normally sane actually enjoy miniature coloured LEDs, winking and blinking through transparent windows like a pixie brothel. Tubes of bubbling, gaudy liquids snake their way through the computer’s guts like tapeworms on acid. Miniature spotlights illuminate cooling fans and heat-sinks from the inside out. These days a serious gamer will spend serious money on a serious PC, then corrupt the whole thing by spraying it with Plasti-Dip peelable, durable, non-slip, rubberised, multi-coloured spew. Yes, I know I shouldn’t have, but a bloke called Xephos made me do it. Let me explain further.

I have been influenced by the newly popular phenomenon of celebrity PCs, where people buy a particular machine simply because their heroes favour it, endorse it or actually commission it in their name. For example one of the world’s most popular videogaming channels on YouTube is called The Yogscast. Last time I counted, it had more than seven and a half million subscribers and over six billion views, and that’s a whole lot of purchasing power. Their founder, this bloke called Xephos, got a business partner of Jeeni to create “the ultimate Yogscast PC range to live stream and play games all day.” And as the factory os not far from me, I went over to mock. But I stayed to pray, and found myself mesmerised by the bloody thing. Bloody as in bejewelled with animated red illuminations inside the see-through casing. Which is how I joined this PC pimping revolution.And even non-gamers are at it. Most regular folk, who normally wear sensible shoes and don’t indulge in bear-baiting or country music, they too have joined the pimping revolution by expressing their personal proclivities via their mobile phones. In the beginning, all mobiles were universally Henry Ford black. Now even old age pensioners wave customised casings around, all lipstick colours, sparkles and cutesy-poo creature decorations. At least, that’s what mine’s like.

But I still suffer from a residual shame over my pimping habit, and like all instant gratification I feel guilty because of it. In fact while looking for a replacement machine recently, I have been quite attracted by one of those shapely models with a bit of sobriety, experience and bulk. And yes, before you ask, it’s black.

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03
Sep

The Creator of Jeeni.

Jeeni has returned to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “I admit we're ahead of our original schedule, but there's still so much more to do. We need to scale our online platform globally now and build our mass artist showcases. Then we can hit all our targets, and give our new artists the recognition they deserve.” It is day 5 today and we have raised 98% of our target £100K. If you want to see our pitch click HERE. Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he's agreed to share his work with all our members. He's a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his Wikipedia page. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mel_Croucher. Here's one of Mel's latest! There was once a little Quaker boy called Charlton, who got sent off to a nice school in Oxfordshire. Charlton liked videogames very much indeed, and when he turned thirteen he became a fan of one particular game which was called Deus Ex Machina. It was hopelessly life-affirming and it allowed him to influence the plotline and outcome, just like a load of similar games. But it was also the first truly interactive movie, running in real time, with voice actors and a full music soundtrack. It came with a large monochrome poster of the face of a beautiful, innocent, yet alluring lady robot, which the boy hung on his wall. And that thought pleases me, because I was the creator of the game, and my intention was to blow the minds of children just like Charlton. Ten years later, he was no longer a Quaker schoolboy but a stroppy atheist, and he was making a living writing very naughty cartoon strips and highly scurrilous columns for a computer magazine called PC Zone. I hope his career choice was influenced by the naughty cartoon strips and scurrilous columns I was writing for the rival magazines he devoured, but I suspect he already considered me to be an old fart. Back then I believed it was my mission to take the piss out of anyone and everyone in the computer industry, and so did young Charlton. He was calling himself Charlie by then. Charlie Brooker. Today, Charlie Brooker is probably best known as the creator of the Netflix phenomenon Black Mirror. In a brilliant episode, he didn’t just nick my idea of an interactive movie where players influence the plotline and outcome, he went and did it for real. He set his episode in 1984, which was the year of my game’s release, and he hung my old poster on the wall for a touch of authenticity. And yes, he did ask permission. And yes, I was more than happy to give it to him. And no, he didn’t pay me. Brooker’s use of the branching narrative was absolutely seamless, and when the viewer-player-actor makes a choice via a mouse or remote control there is absolutely no buffering involved. And just like in my old game, if the viewer-player-actor refuses to make a choice, then the movie-game-stage makes it for them. In the future, I am sure this technique will become an active tool of the porn and ultra-violence industries, but consumers of mainstream entertainment have become more and more bone idle over the years. In fact vast numbers can’t even be bothered to select the crap entertainment they watch or play, but allow algorithms to select for them. So no, this is not the future of movies, it’s the past. Charlie Brooker didn’t predict this, and neither did I. It was predicted by Ray Bradbury in his 1953 novel Fahrenheit 451, where books have been banned because they encourage people to think, and the 1966 film of that story was one of my greatest influences. In the movie, the writer/director François Truffaut introduces us to a world in which the masses consume pap via personal screens, and believe they have choice in determining the outcome of all sorts of vacuous plotlines. They don’t, of course, and the purpose of such so-called entertainments is to pretend the people have a say in the way things are run, what choices they have, and what garbage they believe in. And here we are, more than half a century later, living in just such a society. And we don’t even need movies to condition the masses, we can use videogames. People who live-stream their gameplay are called streamers. People who watch them playing are called lost souls. Today more people watch streamers play sports simulations than watch live sport. This passive practice is ridiculously popular on streaming sites like Twitch, YouTube and a whole host of others. Even back in 2014, Twitch streams for computer games attracted more traffic than America’s leading cable and satellite network HBO, with professional streamers mashing up high-level play and banal commentary. Now they can extort big money from sponsors, subscriptions, and donations. Last year, passive viewers watched active players for more than 450 billion minutes of streamed content on Twitch alone, as the streamers jiggled and babbled while playing with themselves at FIFA 19, Monster Hunter World and all the rest. One such streamer is a charming young man called Richard Tyler Blevins, who sports attractive neon-tinted hair and goes by the name of Ninja. He has minted around ten million dollars from subscribers who pay to watch him play a game called Fortnight. Let me just make that clear – they are not paying to play Fortnite themselves, they are paying to watch Mr Ninja play. Fortnite involves a hundred players at a time who fight and butcher one other to the death until only one is left alive, all in high-definition video. There are currently 200 million players of the game. The youngest players are aged eight, which should worry their parents, but probably doesn’t because mom and pop are too busy passively watching some other streamer. The average age of a Fortnite player is 13, which is the same age as the schoolboy Charlie Brooker was when my hopelessly life-affirming game helped turn him into a potty-mouthed cynic. At least I know I succeeded in something. Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com

06
Jun

My Lockdown A-Z Happiness Manifesto – Why imagination, creativity and gratitude can be a cure for all.

By Sammie Venn Jeeni's Official Writer, Columnist and Blogger. Here at Jeeni.com we celebrate and support all musicians and performers, and poetry has its own dedicated channel for artists and performers to showcase their work and earn 100% of their sales, ticketing, merchandise and donations. Jeeni returned to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent and has already raised £93K, our target is £100K and we have 27 days to go, so we are likely to overfund, which is just amazing. Thanks again to all our wonderful investors. If you want to see our pitch click HERE. Today we showcase Sammie Venn as a very talented and creative writer. I have always been fascinated by the power of the human imagination: the capability of the brain and its capacity to unlock a unique world for every person on the planet. Our thoughts are as unique as fingerprints, so powering up the hippocampus to unravel the labyrinth of our minds can be even more challenging when we are physically isolated from those we love and care for. Lockdown has given us all time to think, sometimes overthink, and evaluate key priorities. These thoughts are often fear-based and at other times they are fuelled by excitement and possibility. At the beginning of COVID-19 I had a long list of ‘lockdown goals’ that I wanted to achieve. I thought I would be able to use the time efficiently to compartmentalise my life, throw some order at the chaos and come through the other side a more polished version of myself. Of course nothing ever goes according to plan. Therefore it felt like the right time to seize the day and further the knowledge and understanding of the human mind, body and soul. The relevance of which resonates even more after being catapulted into a matrix that can only described as something akin to Aldous Huxley’s ‘Brave New World’. Hermann Hesse, German-born Swiss poet, painter, novelist and writer wrote: “I have been and still am a seeker, but I have ceased to question stars and books. I have begun to listen to the teaching my blood whispers to me.” His works explore how an individual searches for authenticity, spirituality and self-knowledge. Unsurprisingly, he won the Nobel Prize for literature in 1946 and has been a real influence when it comes to deciphering principles relating to what education means to me. Kindness, hand in hand with knowledge, is key in my happiness manifesto. September has always been my favourite time of year, a throwback to academia. However online courses in every arena conceivable have become the new normal. We have been unable to sit in classrooms or studios with our fellow peers, so zoom has become the portal for the education of the masses, including our children. The upside is that teaching has become readily accessible and certainly not restricted to certain times of the year. We can learn in the comfort of our own homes, in our pyjamas, with a cup of tea, glass of wine or even sat in the garden. However education is not just about studying for an end goal, its about embracing all that surrounds us, what our culture has to offer and the lessons that we can learn from that. Music teaches us how to express our emotions, whether that is through song writing, performing, dancing or just singing in the shower. We can develop our understanding of life’s twists and turns on a completely different level. The world of music teaches us not just about love, lust, happiness and passion but also about the bonds we have with our fellow human beings. It also lectures us on history, politics and sociology. Music is a platform that enhances our understanding of the world in a magical way, we remember song lyrics, we remember nursery rhymes, we remember the chants and hymns of our ancestors. We learn to come back to ourselves through the power of sound. My education in lockdown encompassed all these salient points. I reconnected on all levels with my hearts centre and created a lockdown happiness manifesto, which by and large I have managed to stick to. My A-Z goes something like this: Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com

04
Jun

Inside Story with Blue Vein

Blue Vein is the stage name of Spanish Singer and Songwriter Alex Gonzalez. He is based in Zaragoza, Spain and performed his new track ‘Catharsis’ in the JAM Festival collaboration in April. Alex is sat in his living room, his signature long dark curls framing a cheeky smile which delightedly remains throughout the interview with team Jeeni member Kate. Kate asks what the story behind his latest release is. “Basically, I really really liked a girl,” he says smiling, “I wanted to express and portray in a song all these feeling that I was going through, the song talks about that, it’s something that lots of people can relate to, and also the phrase in the chorus ‘this is my catharsis’ [refers to] the fact that no matter how sad I am or what difficult times I’m in, my music and writing songs is always there for me and it’s so liberating and a key element for me to have [in my life] in order to be happy.” The video that accompanied the track was a brilliant and eclectic mix of colour and movement. When asked about the creative process behind making the video, his response was, “It was a bit chaotic because at first I was very lost, I had in mind the vibes that I wanted for the clothes, but that was it so normally when you do a video you have in mind the order that you want the shots to be in and you create a storyboard, but, I didn’t,” again he laughs, “and so yes it was very chaotic. What I did was buy the clothes, and a huge reel of green fabric to create the comic effect via a green screen, and then I shot everything in a bit of a rush, using different camera angles, and then in post editing I chose the shots that I thought fit the best.” Despite the chaotic nature of the video shooting, we all agreed it was a huge success and loved the feel that the video gave alongside the track. Alex is also a member of two other bands, The Sun Above Us and Shut, despite this, he continues to release music as a solo artist as well. Kate asks why he decided to make this decision. “I love being in bands, I think that playing with and creating with other people that you love and that inspire you can be the most enriching thing, but our friend Covid”he grimaces, “came and there were no rehearsals, no concerts, so we barely play now.” The disappointment is evident on his face and it’s so sad to see. He continues, “so the Covid situation made me write more songs on my own, and actually it made me worry less, “his smile returns, “as when you’re in a band you [tend] to stick with a certain genre and even a certain language as I also write in Spanish [so this allowed me more freedom].” Alex is from the North East of Spain, a country which has so many distinct musical and cultural influences, Kate asks how these influences have shaped him as an artist. “To be honest I don’t know! I’ve always listened to Spanish music, my parents always played me rock from the 70s, 80s and 90s and I guess I’ve been influenced by choice of melodies and sounds and in that way that’s how I think it has influenced me.” One thing that we notice throughout the interview is that despite Alex’s heritage, he has a very clear English Accent, Kate asks how he came to develop this. Alex throws his fantastic head of hair back and laughs, “Thank you! I don’t know, I’ve always really liked the British accent, so I just practiced and tried to imitate it, but does it sound real, do I sound fake?” Kate smiles and says that she thinks he sounds like David Bowie which I am in complete agreement with! They both laugh and smile at this and Alex blushes a little at the compliment. “Did you always know you wanted to make music?” Kate asks. “Yes! Since I started playing it was like a dream. With Blue Vein I can mix it with my other passion, which is film making, I suck a bit at that but it’s fun.” When asked if he had the opportunity to open a show for any musician, alive or dead, who would it be, he answers, “Well, I don’t think it would fit [very well] because of the genre, but Architects…a British metalcore band in Brighton, they’re basically my favourite band, and even if it was just so I could see them live, I would die to open for them!” They both laugh at the fact that despite Kate attending University in Brighton, she is bashful that she hasn’t heard of them before but promises Alex, she’ll give them a listen. For new artists that are just starting out and who in the future could take part in events such as Jeeni’s JAM Festival, Kate asks what advice Alex would give to them. “It might sound a bit cliché, but you really have to believe in what you do, and understand why you do what you do, because having a defined purpose is going to [allow you to] be driven by it, and not just be motivated to get to an end point, but if you are driven by it, you’re not going to let anything stop you. That and a lot of love and effort. I’d love to give you advice for social media but [I’m not big enough for that yet].” He laughs. Finally, Kate asks what we can expect from Blue Vein in the near future. “Literally anything! When I write songs, I don’t think in any genre, I have deathcore songs, I have soft Spanish ballads, I don’t want any limits on my creations…The next song is going to be an acoustic version of ‘Catharsis’, then a rock ballad in Spanish, and I want to try release soe of my Spanish songs in English as an alternative as well.” To find out more about Blue Vein, listen to his music and invest, please visit https://jeeni.com/showcase/bluevein/

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