I have a confession to make.

Jeeni Blog

Helping the next generation of talent to build a global fanbase

I have a confession to make.

Jeeni has returned to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “Day 5 and we have reached 98% of our 100K target". If you want to see our pitch click HERE.

Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he's agreed to share his work with all our members. He's a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his website www.melcroucher.net. Here's one of Mel's latest!

I have a confession to make. I have been pimping a young model, and I confess my shame. My pimping is the result of a moment of weakness. I’ve had models before, and I understand their capricious nature. One moment they are willing to perform across my desk, and the next they freeze and refuse to let me do what I want to do. But it has not been any fantasy performance that’s got me hooked, it has been the fantasy looks. I was bored. I wanted colour. I wanted make-up. I wanted dazzle and glitter. I wanted tribal tattoos, hot bubbles, glowing tubes and a whirling fan-dance. Forgive me, but I’ve pimped my computer.

In 1909, Henry Ford declared, “I will build a motor car for the great multitude. It will be constructed of the best materials, by the best men to be hired, after the best designs that modern engineering can devise. And no man making a good salary will be unable to own one.” He then added his famous line, “The customer can have his car painted any colour he wants as long as it’s black.” And so they were. Painted black. When I was young, cars were still mostly black, apart from the odd spot of lipstick around the exhaust pipes of those used in suicide pacts. As for computer manufacturers, they all followed Henry Ford’s marketing strategy for half a century. Except their colour of choice was not black, but the sort of beige favoured by dead maggots. The exception was the ZX Spectrum which was black, but the keyboard really was made of dead maggots. Apart from that aberration, beige was the colour. In fact the beige box came to be used as a term of derision for desktops, implying dated, boring specifications.

For example, IBM's early desktop computers were not only very beige indeed, but also very box-shaped indeed, and most PC clone manufacturers followed suit. As IBM and its imitators came to dominate the industry, beige boxes became the unquestioned norm for boring desktop computer design. Even early Apple Macs were beige boxes, until Apple took the revolutionary step in 1987 of switching to the even more boring shade of Chicken Poo By Moonlight. Not long after, equally boring videogame consoles took over the world, until there were so many revolting grey Nintendos and Segas and Playstations and Gameboys, that they had to be transported across deep space to be turned into landfill on distant moons. Meanwhile all Earthbound computers were still fifty shades of grey, until one day Apple changed everything.I remember the shock when their 1988 iMacs were launched. Suddenly we had a choice of computers that looked like see-through giant jellybabies, in a range of five neon colours called gangrene, monkeybum, impetigo, barbie and mince. And that was the end of the adult era in electronics, as a collective madness took over computer marketing. Now users are persuaded to buy machines not for what they do in the adult world, but for their infantile appearance. Users who are normally sane actually enjoy miniature coloured LEDs, winking and blinking through transparent windows like a pixie brothel. Tubes of bubbling, gaudy liquids snake their way through the computer’s guts like tapeworms on acid. Miniature spotlights illuminate cooling fans and heat-sinks from the inside out. These days a serious gamer will spend serious money on a serious PC, then corrupt the whole thing by spraying it with Plasti-Dip peelable, durable, non-slip, rubberised, multi-coloured spew. Yes, I know I shouldn’t have, but a bloke called Xephos made me do it. Let me explain further.

I have been influenced by the newly popular phenomenon of celebrity PCs, where people buy a particular machine simply because their heroes favour it, endorse it or actually commission it in their name. For example one of the world’s most popular videogaming channels on YouTube is called The Yogscast. Last time I counted, it had more than seven and a half million subscribers and over six billion views, and that’s a whole lot of purchasing power. Their founder, this bloke called Xephos, got a business partner of Jeeni to create “the ultimate Yogscast PC range to live stream and play games all day.” And as the factory os not far from me, I went over to mock. But I stayed to pray, and found myself mesmerised by the bloody thing. Bloody as in bejewelled with animated red illuminations inside the see-through casing. Which is how I joined this PC pimping revolution.And even non-gamers are at it. Most regular folk, who normally wear sensible shoes and don’t indulge in bear-baiting or country music, they too have joined the pimping revolution by expressing their personal proclivities via their mobile phones. In the beginning, all mobiles were universally Henry Ford black. Now even old age pensioners wave customised casings around, all lipstick colours, sparkles and cutesy-poo creature decorations. At least, that’s what mine’s like.

But I still suffer from a residual shame over my pimping habit, and like all instant gratification I feel guilty because of it. In fact while looking for a replacement machine recently, I have been quite attracted by one of those shapely models with a bit of sobriety, experience and bulk. And yes, before you ask, it’s black.

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10
Jun

Let’s celebrate the “F” word – unlocking the power of our feminity. By Sammie Venn

By Sammie Venn Jeeni's Official Writer, Columnist and Blogger. Here at Jeeni.com we celebrate and support all musicians and performers, and poetry has its own dedicated channel for artists and performers to showcase their work and earn 100% of their sales, ticketing, merchandise and donations. Last week Jeeni returned to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. We have been very encouraged with the positive response as we reached our target in just 6 days and now overfunding If you want to see our pitch click HERE. Today we showcase Sammie Venn as a very talented and creative writer. “For I conclude that the enemy is not lipstick, but guilt itself; we deserve lipstick, if we want it, AND free speech; we deserve to be sexual AND serious—or whatever we please. We are entitled to wear cowboy boots to our own revolution.” After reading Dr Naomi Wolfs powerful words I dug my cowboy boots out of the closet, turned the radio up and attempted to work through my own solitary revolution. I too wanted lipstick, love and liberty. I wanted to dance to my own beat and feel ecstatic about it. I have been in the retail industry for over 25 years now; understanding what women want and correlating that to how they feel, is a task both meaningful and joyful to me. It is something I continue to learn and explore daily as finding our inimitable style is part of the process of discovering our femininity; for me it is about how we show up in the world. I have never been an avid follower of fast fashion, the clothes we wear and how we choose to adorn ourselves is part of being authentically who we are. At heart I am a boho gypsy who longs to live her life in maxi dresses with no shoes, in the sunshine. This is of course not always practical but I like to kiss the earth with my toes as often as I can and working from home, especially at the moment provides me with that luxury. Celebrating our femininity should be a practice that connects both the pleasure and magic of being a woman. It’s easy to berate ourselves, finding fault in the smallest of details but it is those elements that we should embrace and nurture more than anything; it is after all what makes us unique in this world. I had a hip replacement a couple of years ago at the age of 45. As painful and heart breaking as it was, I learnt to love the scar I see every day, as it was that very operation which allowed me to walk again. Falling in love with your body, scars and all, is about accepting everything that is wild, vulnerable and rampant about it. Listening to our intuition and feeling the emotions that accompany it, is a practice worthy of time and dedication. I have always appreciated music, the soundtrack that accompanies my life is as varied and eclectic as the decades I have lived in. Maya Angelou wrote that “ a bird does not sing because it has the answers, it sings because it has a song”. So when we write, listen or perform, we give something of our heart to a receiving audience. I have been working on a series of practices that will hopefully help to reclaim our pleasure both internally and externally. Here are a few rituals that harness the wisdom that we all carry within ourselves. Something for the mind, body and spirit. Reclaiming Pleasure. When we feel pleasure, we radiate it. Our skin glows, our eyes smile and our bodies feel more fluid and engaged with life in the moment. Finding pleasure in our daily activities is all part of a healthy sacred self-care regime. Notice what brings you joy, is it walking in nature? Dancing slowly to a rhythmic beat? Eating delicious food? Meditating? Soaking in a candlelit bath? Whatever it is, write it down and designate some time to your desires. Fulfilling our deepest needs brings us joy and harmony. Date Yourself. Have a date with yourself, be your own lover. Imagine your ideal soiree then recreate that for yourself, it can be wildly extravagant or very simple. A few years ago I took myself out for dinner, I dressed as if I were going out for the perfect first date. It was an odd experience as I had never done anything like this before. I was as nervous about being alone in a restaurant as I would have been meeting a prospective partner. But after my first glass of prosecco, I eased into the evening. I pulled out my notebook and listed everything I wanted to attract into my life; health, the feeling of safety, oneness with myself and those I loved, a man who respected me on all levels and a career I could be proud of. I ate my dinner mindfully, observed those around me and then smiled to myself, I remember feeling happy for the first time in years. I still have the journal I wrote in that night, I see it as part of my self-healing revolution. When you commit to choosing you, that loving vibration will radiate into all areas of your life. Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com

05
Jun

Jeeni announces FREE Membership for all Musicians, Performers and Fans, whilst artists keep 100% of everything they earn.

Live venues are out, but your audience is still there. That's why we have turned our online streaming service, from subscription based membership to absolutely FREE. We are determined to support all Musicians, Performers and Pros to earn money while the COVID-19 pandemic prevents them from playing live shows. As the entertainment industry pumps out new ways of thinking to support creatives in this troubled time, we as a team are agile and committed to change the platform day to day if necessary. In the meantime we have spent the last week working hard behind the scenes to make sure Jeeni is there is help and removed membership fees and restructured the platform so you can get paid directly to your bank account or PayPal account, with no hidden fees or charges. So How Does It Work? Jeeni is an online showcase that puts your talent in front of a global audience. We do all the work and you reap all the rewards. No hype, no adverts, no scams, no rip-offs, no fakes, no charge. We give you all the tools you need to showcase your talent, and reach out to your target audience in safety. You will be able to keep 100% of everything you earn from the sale of your music, donations, live streaming and merchandise. We have responded fast to update the platform this week to reflect the changing offer, our sole purpose to support musicians and performers in such uncertain times. We are looking for members of the Independent Musicians and Performers Community Group to join us and help us beta test and develop the platform faster, so we can scale and showcase your music globally. You may not have a showcase and just love listening to your favorite bands or acts for free, but as a FAN you can also join and help us test the site. So what's the catch? There is none... you have nothing to lose, everything to gain, all in a completely free and in a safe environment. Jeeni promises to treat you ethically, honestly and with respect, so that you can stay creative and stay safe. Check us out and join us, just two easy steps entirely for FREE. www.jeeni.com

05
May

Artists' rights have been stuck like a broken record, until Broken Record asked for Reform

An open letter was sent to Prime Minister Boris Johnson on the 20th of April, demanding, finally, that there be a reform in music streaming services. Hoorah! We hear you say, but what does this mean? Well, everything that Jeeni stands for, in essence the fair and equal treatment of music makers and artists. High profile artists such as Sir Paul McCartney, Coldplay’s Chris Martin, Boy George and Jessie Ware, have all signed the open letter and petition asking for a regulator to ensure these actions, in order to make the UK “…the best place in the world to be a musician or songwriter.” The move was spearheaded by the Musicians’ Union and the Broken Record campaign but has garnered more than 150 signatures from famous faces across the UK music industry and the support of over 5000 musicians and fans. Since the launch of Spotify in 2008, streaming services have quickly become our primary method for listening to music instead of through the more traditional methods of radio and Television. What these streaming services don’t offer however, is protection and fair treatment of the artists and songwriters. In November 2020, as part of an investigation into streaming royalties, it was found that some artists were receiving just a fraction of a US cent per song streamed and worse, some no compensation at all. In order for this to change, only small amendments need to be made to the 1998 Copyright, Designs and Patents Act, however the outcome for artists could mean the difference in being able to pay next month’s rent or not as many have unfortunately experienced. At a time when we need to be looking for ways to restart the post-Covid financial recovery, a truly free market would allow a song to achieve greater profits and therefore, as the letter addresses, put more money in the pockets of UK taxpayers which can only benefit our economy. Fundamentally we don’t want to stop listening to and seeing the artists and musicians we love. When we are able, we want to dance along at concerts, sing our hearts out at gigs and sway to the rhythm that an artist has worked hard to create for us, so why should they not be paid and treated fairly? We want the music industry to thrive, and it is why we at Jeeni believe that it is so important to do this. You can support the petition at https://www.change.org/p/boris-johnson-put-the-value-of-music-back-where-it-belongs-in-the-hands-of-music-makers Let’s make 2021 a great and fair one.

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