Jeeni Blog

Helping the next generation of talent to build a global fanbase

Huawei to Hell

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Huawei to Hell

Today, Jeeni returns to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “We’re ahead of our original schedule, but there’s still so much more to do. We need to scale our online platform globally now and build our mass artist showcases to hit all our targets, and give our new artists the recognition they deserve.” If you want to see our pitch click HERE.

Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he’s agreed to share his work with our members. He’s a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his Wikipedia page. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mel_Croucher. Here’s Mel’s latest!

Trade wars are dangerous. When tariffs are imposed, and when sanctions get slapped on, and when one nation ceases to trade with another nation, then a trade war has a funny habit of turning into a real war. And here we all are, slap bang in the middle of a lulu of a trade war between the world’s two most powerful states. This is a trade war that’s not based on essentials like oil, or wheat, or toilet paper, but a trade war based on the pixies and fairy-dust of software algorithms. One day a peace treaty is waved, next day missiles are launched. Here is what happened in the future.

The proxy war between the Donald Trump and Boris Johnson axis against Xi Jinping didn’t affect me much, seeing as I had never owned a Huawei handset. I admit that I did find some comfort in the fact that cellphone zombies became totally bereft at the prospect of not being able to view TikTok on their little Chinese screens. All I could say to those morons was - suck it up guys, you had it coming!

In the first few hours of the Huawei denial of service attacks, the bewilderment and confusion of being unable to access social media apps soon turned to anger. This was triggered by the fact that the masses were unable to access social media apps to tell one another that they could not access social media apps. They soon realised they couldn’t remember any contact details of any of their virtual friends, or why they were virtual friends in the first place. Neither could they remember where they were, or where anything else was, or how to find their way around the real world at all. And without the Uber app they found themselves physically marooned within the perimeters of their ignorance. Deliveroo failed to respond the following day, so to avoid starvation, people who had a strong sense of smell managed to find their way to MacDonalds. But the computers were down and riots began when the Cola ran out, as slow-motion customers blamed Covid19 for the fact that China and the USA were having a software spat.

That night, the younger, more active elements of society went on the rampage and looted Tescos for pot noodles, which was a total waste of effort because the electric kettles no longer worked, thanks to smart-meter reliance on dodgy apps. Tuesday evening, after martial law and compulsory prayers, the county lines failed to supply recreational drugs to their app-driven client base, and hospitals were targeted to fill the gap in the market. Amusing video clips of the descent into chaos were not shared, not because of any sense of social responsibility but because Instagram was kaput. This added to the howling rage of the mob more than somewhat. Then, not long after the dogs began to disappear, the hunting of the weak began, and there was the smell of woodsmoke and bacon in the air. On a more positive note, a lot of overweight people slimmed down fast and learned new skills like shadow puppetry and crossbow production.

And so it was that all those predictions how civilisation would end as the result of electro-magnetic-pulse attacks turned out to be wrong. There was no need to launch missiles, zap communications or fry every electronic circuit in the land. All it took was an old man with an orange face to start a pissing contest. The irony that the old man’s preferred means of communication was Twitter is not lost on me, but then I don’t need Google Maps to tell me that we’re all up shit creek without a paddle.

And that, dear reader, is how come we all ended up on the Huawei to Hell.

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Jeeni supports Escape to the Farm

02
Sep

Jeeni supports Escape to the Farm

  Jeeni supports Arms Around the Child’s Escape to the Farm Looking for a family day out that supports children in third world countries? Presenting Arms Around The Child’s Escape to the Farm! Located at the idyllic Rushmere Farm in Hambledon, in Southern England's fabulous South Downs National Park, Escape to the Farm is a yoga retreat come summer camp where there is something for everyone. Explore food workshops and pizza making, poetry, eco talks and much more. There’s something for everyone to explore! Need some relaxing after a long six weeks holiday? Try one of the yoga, tai chi or meditation groups, guaranteed to help you take some breathing space and let go of all your worries. With live acoustic performances, storytelling and sound healing, there’s plenty of noise to block out the hustle and bustle of everyday life at Escape to the Farm. Are you a budding art enthusiast? Try your hand at life and nature drawing and learn a new skill. Come evening time you can gather around a roaring campfire before heading to bed in a beautiful yurt or tent of your own. Day Ticket £20 Day Ticket + Lunch & Dinner £35 Camping Per Night £10 Enquire for Accommodation Options Luxury Accommodation Yurts & Camping Escape to the Farm is a fundraiser for the Arms Around The Child charity who are raising money to build a school in Ghana for underprivileged children. Jeeni supports Arms Around The Child, who provide generously for children living in extreme adversity globally. To donate directly to Arms Around The Child you can go to their website www.armsaroundthechild.org/. Arms Around The Child seek to provide sanctuary, community, warmth protection, education, healthcare, safety, family, equality, love, hope and respect. Contact Jeeni Ambassador Ellie Milner for more details and get yourselves down to Escape to the Farm for a day of fun that will leave you fulfilled in all the best ways. Ellie: +447801292553 info@armsaroundthechild.org www.armsaroundthechild.org/

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Meet The Curators Behind Spotify Playlists - the A and R Dictatorship

06
Jun

Meet The Curators Behind Spotify Playlists - the A and R Dictatorship

Landing on an official curated Spotify playlist is for many artists a holy grail. To provide some insight, we hear from a Spotify editor about how they find the songs which eventually make the cut. Spotify seems to be the opposite of Jeeni, where the process is democratic and those artists that start trending are based on real votes, and whilst technology has moved on they are still in the dark ages where their music is still decided and dictated by A&R agents. And unlike Jeeni.com, with Spotify if they don't like the look of you, then you're not coming in! Guest post from Spotify for Artists by Khalilia Douze A Spotify editor explains how they discover songs to include in their curated lists. Being added to a Spotify playlist remains the dream for most emerging artists, as it exposes their work to some of the most-clicked on playlists in the world. But for many musicians and their teams, the behind-the-scenes process still feels shrouded in mystery. While there’s no formula for scoring a coveted slot on Pollen or RapCaviar, there is rhyme and reason to how the massive team of editors curate tracks. We spoke with one Spotify staffer, who helps oversee R&B playlists such as the genre flagship Are & Be, The Newness, Soul Coffee, Soul Lounge the Black Lives Matter playlist and more, to learn about their process and tips on how musicians can stand out when pitching unreleased music through Spotify for Artists. Spotify for Artists: What strategies do you use to curate playlists? The strategy is based on the playlist itself. Each has its own hypothesis, theme, or audience that we’re thinking about. If it’s one of the genre-specific playlists, like Are & Be, that’s the home for the current, biggest songs in that space. The Newness is new releases or developing artists. Chilled R&B, Soul Coffee, those playlists have a mix of current and some legacy and catalog artists. It really all depends on what the goal of the specific playlist is. What are you listening for when you’re curating? I’m listening for lyrics. I’m listening for melody. A lot depends on the playlist itself, and sometimes that’s the filter that I have. When I’m listening, [I’m like] Oh, this song would do good in this playlist or, This song could fit here for this moment. A lot of it is based on the audience. You have the specific genres, but then there’s a lot of cases where those lines are blurred. The instrumentation and the beat can determine an audience, so [we think about] where we believe the audience is for that particular song. Does song length play a role in how you’re curating? It depends on the playlist. Soul Coffee is more of a relaxing [vibe]. In our minds, that’s one of those where you would just get up in the morning and that’s what you throw on while you’re getting ready, eating breakfast, or reading a book on Sunday. I know that the people will just have it on, so that playlist has a longer time spent listening as opposed to the flagship, Are & Be, and The Newness. For The Newness, when people are listening to that or one where it’s developing artists and new releases, that’s more about discovery. People may not spend a lot of time listening to that playlist—it’s about skimming and seeing what’s out. Can you walk me through how you use the submission tool to discover music? Labels pitch to us every week. We’re able to get their submissions through there, but they also communicate with our Artist Label Partnership team. We’ll talk to them [about] what their plan is for their priorities. There’s a ton of music—it’s countless. That’s pretty much the majority of Mondays and Tuesdays, listening to the pitches that come in for that week. It goes to our whole team. We listen to everything. The rest of the week is updating the playlists and finding the space for them, reviewing what songs are already in the playlist, looking at the performance, and things like that. When it comes to tags in the submission form, what advice do you have? People should be as specific as possible and fill out every single thing to make sure it goes to the right people. Different editors might have different filters to differentiate. I’m listening for if it’s a cool song first and foremost, but past my opinion of it, do I know if there’s a home for it? It’s about being able to find it and [seeing] where it can fit. I’ve seen entries where it would literally just be the artist name and their title—that’s how it gets lost in the abyss. We’re not omnipotent, so we don’t know what we don’t know. Are there any rules about how many times an artist can be playlisted? No. Every curator is different and has [their] own philosophy on what songs are in a playlist. There’s no concrete rule. Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com

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Visa-Free EU Travel Petition for Performers and Bands

12
Mar

Visa-Free EU Travel Petition for Performers and Bands

Finally, a deal has been agreed with the EU and on 1 January 2021, the UK is going it alone. However, one vital element of the economy seems to have been left out of the agreed terms - Musicians. A petition for visa-free travel or 'Musicians Passport' for this huge part of the the population is gaining enthusiastic momentum via social media and at the point of writing, is well about 155,000 signatures, growing by approximately 1,000 every 1/4 of an hour. Several industries have been granted visa-free access to the 27 EU states in the final agreement. Despite the government being lobbied by a number of industry heavyweights and artists, their concerns the new rules could jeopardise the £5.8billion music industry, when live gigs and shows are back on the social spectrum, have not seen visa-free travel for musicians addressed. Touring Europe, bands and artists may need secure visas for each country they plan to perform in, making it far more costly and harder to afford for many artists and crew members. The Visa-Free petition’s creator Tim Brennan added: “As a freelancer, I and many like me, travel through the EU countless times a year on different tours and events, this will become impossible due to cost and time if we do not have visa free travel.” The petition reads: “We would like the UK Govt to negotiate a free cultural work permit that gives us visa-free travel throughout the 27 EU states for music touring professionals, bands, musicians, artists, TV and sports celebrities that tour the EU to perform shows and events & Carnet exception [allowing the temporary import or export of goods without having to pay duty or VAT] for touring equipment,” You can sign the petition here: https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/563294 At the time of the lobbying, a government spokesperson told NME: “We are working closely with the arts and culture sector to prepare for the end of the transition period and recognise the importance of touring for UK musicians. We are seeking a reciprocal agreement with the EU to allow UK citizens to undertake some business activities in the bloc without a work permit, on a short-term basis.” Last week (December 25), UK Music's chief exec. Jamie Njoku-Goodwin welcomed the government's EU deal, but said it still left “many questions” unanswered for the music industry. Jamie Njoku-Goodwin - Chief Executive of Music UK Njoku-Goodwin is one of the Government’s most senior advisers with unrivalled political connections across Downing Street, Whitehall and Westminster. He was a special adviser to Health Secretary Matt Hancock and also worked as a special adviser at the Department for Digital, Culture, Media and Sport. Once the petition reaches 100,000 signatures, it may be considered for debate in Parliament. Industry eyes will be looking straight at Njoku-Goodwin to be the man to have the debate converted in to action. We will posts any updates as we get them.

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