Jeeni Blog

Helping the next generation of talent to build a global fanbase

Huawei to Hell

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Huawei to Hell

Today, Jeeni returns to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “We’re ahead of our original schedule, but there’s still so much more to do. We need to scale our online platform globally now and build our mass artist showcases to hit all our targets, and give our new artists the recognition they deserve.” If you want to see our pitch click HERE.

Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he’s agreed to share his work with our members. He’s a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his Wikipedia page. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mel_Croucher. Here’s Mel’s latest!

Trade wars are dangerous. When tariffs are imposed, and when sanctions get slapped on, and when one nation ceases to trade with another nation, then a trade war has a funny habit of turning into a real war. And here we all are, slap bang in the middle of a lulu of a trade war between the world’s two most powerful states. This is a trade war that’s not based on essentials like oil, or wheat, or toilet paper, but a trade war based on the pixies and fairy-dust of software algorithms. One day a peace treaty is waved, next day missiles are launched. Here is what happened in the future.

The proxy war between the Donald Trump and Boris Johnson axis against Xi Jinping didn’t affect me much, seeing as I had never owned a Huawei handset. I admit that I did find some comfort in the fact that cellphone zombies became totally bereft at the prospect of not being able to view TikTok on their little Chinese screens. All I could say to those morons was - suck it up guys, you had it coming!

In the first few hours of the Huawei denial of service attacks, the bewilderment and confusion of being unable to access social media apps soon turned to anger. This was triggered by the fact that the masses were unable to access social media apps to tell one another that they could not access social media apps. They soon realised they couldn’t remember any contact details of any of their virtual friends, or why they were virtual friends in the first place. Neither could they remember where they were, or where anything else was, or how to find their way around the real world at all. And without the Uber app they found themselves physically marooned within the perimeters of their ignorance. Deliveroo failed to respond the following day, so to avoid starvation, people who had a strong sense of smell managed to find their way to MacDonalds. But the computers were down and riots began when the Cola ran out, as slow-motion customers blamed Covid19 for the fact that China and the USA were having a software spat.

That night, the younger, more active elements of society went on the rampage and looted Tescos for pot noodles, which was a total waste of effort because the electric kettles no longer worked, thanks to smart-meter reliance on dodgy apps. Tuesday evening, after martial law and compulsory prayers, the county lines failed to supply recreational drugs to their app-driven client base, and hospitals were targeted to fill the gap in the market. Amusing video clips of the descent into chaos were not shared, not because of any sense of social responsibility but because Instagram was kaput. This added to the howling rage of the mob more than somewhat. Then, not long after the dogs began to disappear, the hunting of the weak began, and there was the smell of woodsmoke and bacon in the air. On a more positive note, a lot of overweight people slimmed down fast and learned new skills like shadow puppetry and crossbow production.

And so it was that all those predictions how civilisation would end as the result of electro-magnetic-pulse attacks turned out to be wrong. There was no need to launch missiles, zap communications or fry every electronic circuit in the land. All it took was an old man with an orange face to start a pissing contest. The irony that the old man’s preferred means of communication was Twitter is not lost on me, but then I don’t need Google Maps to tell me that we’re all up shit creek without a paddle.

And that, dear reader, is how come we all ended up on the Huawei to Hell.

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Where Did All The Bands Go?

23
Mar

Where Did All The Bands Go?

This month, Adam Levine of Maroon 5 caused a ripple when he was chatting to Apple Music's, Zane Lowe. Whilst referring to all the bands about in 2002 when they released their first album, he questioned, "where did all the bands go? I feel like they're a dying breed." After clarifying he meant bands, "in the pop limelight", it still managed to spark a mix of bemusement and outrage from some fellow artists. Maroon 5's Adam Levine - photo Mauricio Santana Though his remarks may have smarted somewhat, it can't be denied, he has a point! In the early 00's new bands were a dime a dozen, filling arenas and regularly collecting platinum discs. New TV talent shows such as Pop Idol and X Factor filled Saturday nights with girl groups and boy bands, but the trend is shifting. According to Dorian Lynskey in the Guardian, currently, there are nine groups in the UK Top 100 and only one in the Top 40. Two are the Killers and Fleetwood Mac, with songs 17 and 44 years old respectively, while the others are the last UK pop group standing (Little Mix), two four-man bands (Glass Animals, Kings of Leon), two dance groups (Rudimental, Clean Bandit) and two rap units (D-Block Europe, Bad Boy Chiller Crew). There are duos and trios, but made up of solo artists guesting with each other. In Spotify’s Top 50 most-played songs globally right now, there are only three groups (BTS, the Neighbourhood, and the Internet Money rap collective), and only six of the 42 artists on the latest Radio 1 playlist are bands: Wolf Alice, Haim, Royal Blood, Architects, London Grammar and the Snuts. Of course, radio and streaming are dominated by pop, rap and dance music but festival lineups don’t point to a golden age of bands, either. Of those that have emerged in the past decade, only half a dozen have headlined either Coachella, Reading/Leeds, Latitude, Download, Wireless or the main two stages at Glastonbury. That’s The 1975, Haim, alt-J, Rudimental, Bastille and Tame Impala, and the last of those is effectively a solo project. Only one band, the Lathums, appeared on the BBC’s annual tastemaking Sound of … longlist this year, which is not unusual: bands haven’t been in the majority since 2013. The album charts are still regularly topped by bands thanks to loyal fanbases who still buy physical formats – such as Mogwai, Architects and Kings of Leon in recent weeks – but not since 2016 has one hung on for a second week. So what happened? With even the largest, well known bands struggling to get into the Top 20 in the streaming world, could one theory be, solo artists are cheaper and easier to handle for the record labels? Apparently not, according to Dirty Hit label's, Jamie Osborne. His independent label is responsible for among others, Wolf Alice and The 1975, but he is still desperate to find the next band he can sign and develop. However, he's not finding it easy! The problem is, he says, there aren’t that many around. “It’s more likely now that a kid will make music in isolation because of technology. When I first met the 1975, they were all friends meeting in a room to make noise. So much is done in bedrooms these days, so you’re more likely to be by yourself.” The 1975 - photo Spotify Press Ben Mortimer, co-president of Polydor Records, says that cost is more of an issue for artists than for labels. “If you’re young and inspired to become a musician, you face a choice. If you go the band route, you need to find bandmates with a similar vision, you need expensive instruments and equipment, and you need to get out on the road to hone your craft. On the other hand, you could download Ableton [production software], shut your bedroom door and get creating straight away. Culture is shaped by technology.” So if the expenses are too high to even start a band, then rehearsal space and travel costs just add to the negatives. Does that mean bands and touring will only be for the rich, middle-class kids? “Social media has filled the hole, creating individual stars who are seen as more ‘authentic’ than anything the retro talent-show format could offer,” says Hannah Rose Ewens, author of Fangirls, a study of contemporary fandom. "Social media is built for individual self-expression. Platforms such as TikTok, Instagram and Twitter – and even the portrait orientation of a smartphone screen – give an advantage to single voices and faces while making group celebrity less legible.  Hannah Rose Ewens with her book 'Fangirls' The challenge posed by all pop cultural trends is to work out whether or not it is a permanent structural shift or just another phase. The right group at the right time, whether it is the Strokes or the Spice Girls, can change everything. In the short term, the pandemic has made it impossible for new bands to form and threatens the survival of the regional venue circuit on which they depend, while Brexit has thrown up expensive new obstacles for touring bands. Yet Jamie Oborne remains optimistic. “I’m excited about the wave of creativity that’s going to follow this period that we’ve just lived through,” he says. “I feel this hankering in youth culture for real experience and connection. I’m still quite the romantic when it comes to music. Look at Fontaines DC. I see a picture of them and wish I was in a band. It’s the same thing as walking down the street with your friends and feeling like you’re part of something. Anything’s possible.”

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Calling All Graduates Looking For Work, Jeeni Officially Partners With Gradfuel to Create 654 New Jobs!!

04
Feb

Calling All Graduates Looking For Work, Jeeni Officially Partners With Gradfuel to Create 654 New Jobs!!

Kickstart is a governmental scheme, introduced by Rishi Sunak as a response to the pandemic and the difficulty it created in employment for young people. Since its introduction last September, the initiative has boosted the careers of over 100,000 young people in the UK. This scheme has provided hope for young people who are trying to find their passion, career and purpose at a time when they need it most.   Jeeni has been working with our specialist partners, Gradfuel who are consultants for the Department of Work and Pensions, which is where the Kickstart grant funding comes from. It’s a great opportunity for companies like Jeeni to bring keen young graduates on board for a minimum of six months, and scale up the business. Also, there’s no financial risk, with over £8,000 worth of grant money to support each young person taken on board. Gradfuel has worked with over 20,000 graduates and have been praised by companies such as ‘Fethr’ and ‘Thursday’.  Apply to Gradfuel here: https://careers.gradfuel.co/kickstart-application-j/    That's why Jeeni is so proud to be making good use of the Kickstart scheme with Gradfuel, to train, support and build the portfolios of people aged 16-24 and on universal credit.  The Kickstart scheme can be essential for both employers and employees, because young companies can build a workforce at no cost at all to them, and young people get paid positions in the industry of their passion. The Government provides the grants to cover 100% of wages and national insurance contributions for well-qualified, pre-screened young workers on universal credit. The positions span across 6 months for up to 25 hours work a week and you receive a £1,500 cash injection into your business for each new person you take on with Kickstart.  Although the governmental Kickstart scheme itself provides this crucial helping hand for companies and graduates, websites like Gradfuel are vital in guiding those graduates to the perfect Kickstart role for their careers.  Gradfuel is a mediator between the Kickstart scheme and those it was designed to help. They provide an interpersonal and proactive connection to young people looking for a career path and “matches you with the perfect graduate jobs”. As of right now, Gradfuel have carried out over 100,000 conversations with their clients about their future and career opportunities. The pool of possibilities after education can seem endless and overwhelming, so a company like Gradfuel that takes you by the hand and leads you to a company that needs you as much as you need them is an extraordinarily valuable service.   Our partners, Gradfuel are the experts in the market, and have raised £18.7m in Kickstart grant funding so far. Gradfuel have had a 99.5% success rate in their applications, against the market average of 22%, supporting over 1,400 companies to process their Kickstart applications.  Jeeni can personally attest to the effectiveness and value of using the Kickstart scheme through Gradfuel. Zak Ahmed, Jeeni’s HR specialist had this to say about the opportunity, “The Kickstart Scheme has helped me gain the vital experience I need as a recent Masters graduate. I’ve found a very meaningful role here at Jeeni, where I’m progressing quicker than I could’ve imagined!”  Zak Ahmed, HR Manager Ella Venvell used Gradfuel to find her Kickstart position as Jeeni’s Artist Liaison and Marketing Leader, “The kickstart scheme has given me an invaluable experience which has helped me learn about the professional world as well as given me the time to develop myself and my portfolio.” and with regards to Gradfuel, Ella said that it’s “helped me find a job doing what I love, and am hoping to do as my lifetime career.”  Ella Venvell, Marketing Leader Past Marketing Executives, Rebecca Allen and Kate Stewart mention how invaluable their kickstart positions at Jeeni have been for them in her Inside Story interviews. Kate said, “In terms of kickstarting my career, if you will, my time at Jeeni has been so helpful, I’ve been provided with lots of training opportunities and learned lots of transferrable skills”. Rebecca also reflected on the skills that she was able to hone from her kickstart role at Jeeni, “I definitely think I’ve developed a knowledge of social media. I was also able to complete a lot of training courses, I did one on SEO and Google analytics.” Available here: Rebecca Allen, Kate Stewart.  Among the 655 new roles available across England include; 116 sales positions, with a focus in London, Manchester and remote situations, 143 roles in Marketing, also for people based in London, Manchester or remote, 118 hospitality roles particularly in London and Birmingham, 121 admin positions focused on remote and London. There are also 31 roles for those specialised in graphic design such as Photoshop and Adobe for remote and London-based applicants. IT and data have 81 roles for London-based and remote situations and finally, there are 25 roles in finance, also for London and remotely working applicants.  Don’t miss out on these opportunities and visit here for more information. https://grants.gradfuel.co/kickstarter-landing-c/  Apply to Gradfuel here: https://careers.gradfuel.co/kickstart-application-j/  

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Artist Focus: RD Watson

09
Mar

Artist Focus: RD Watson

Considered The English voiceover artist, RD Watson is an indisputable legend of the recording industry whose voice has been heard by millions across the world.  Roger Watson is an invaluable Jeeni ambassador. His showcase currently features over 40 examples of his first-rate voiceover performances including audio books like ‘Hairy London’  and commercials for ‘Diablo’ and ‘Jaguar’. His status as an industry icon has greatly broadened Jeeni’s representation of art and creativity and has meant that Jeeni’s mission is not limited to musicians but open to all artists that deserve worldwide attention. Visit RD Watson’s giant and fascinating showcase here: https://jeeni.com/showcase/rd-watson-audiobooks/   RD Watson has been an integral behind-the-scenes component of countless historical moments that define the current music industry as we know it. For example, Roger was acting floor manager for the Beatles back in 1964 and was the producer for the first ever video pop album with Blondie’s Debbie Harry. His connections and the demand for his talent and know-how lead to him moving to L.A. in the 70s. This is where Roger became a Grammy-nominated record producer and was the MD of Arista Records, where he worked with Lisa Stansfield, Barry Manilow and countless others.  RD Watson is a trusted and reliable name in the voiceover world due to his clear, charming and remarkably British performances. He won the Audiophile Award for Narration and has been nominated for many others. He records his own voice in a studio in West London and sends his performances to many clients both from the UK and overseas and is currently in the process of recording Charles Dickens’ ‘David Copperfield’.  This fascinating and talented artist could fill a book with the experiences and stories he’s gathered and he’d no doubt like to record the audiobook of it himself. Check out more of RD Watson’s work on his website here: http://englishvoiceover.info/ and listen to the entirety of ‘Hairy London’ from his showcase, available here: https://jeeni.com/showcase/rd-watson-audiobooks/  How can Jeeni support artists like RD Watson?   JEENI is a multi-channel platform for original entertainment on demand. We’re a direct service between creatives and the global audience.  Artist biography Artist Biography artist biography • We give creatives, independent artists and performers a showcase for their talent and services. And they keep 100% of everything they make.  • We empower our audience and reward them every step of the way.  • We promise to treat our members ethically, fairly, honestly and with respect.  • Access to artist liaison and a supportive marketing team. 

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