Jeeni Blog

Helping the next generation of talent to build a global fanbase

Huawei to Hell

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Huawei to Hell

Today, Jeeni returns to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “We’re ahead of our original schedule, but there’s still so much more to do. We need to scale our online platform globally now and build our mass artist showcases to hit all our targets, and give our new artists the recognition they deserve.” If you want to see our pitch click HERE.

Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he’s agreed to share his work with our members. He’s a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his Wikipedia page. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mel_Croucher. Here’s Mel’s latest!

Trade wars are dangerous. When tariffs are imposed, and when sanctions get slapped on, and when one nation ceases to trade with another nation, then a trade war has a funny habit of turning into a real war. And here we all are, slap bang in the middle of a lulu of a trade war between the world’s two most powerful states. This is a trade war that’s not based on essentials like oil, or wheat, or toilet paper, but a trade war based on the pixies and fairy-dust of software algorithms. One day a peace treaty is waved, next day missiles are launched. Here is what happened in the future.

The proxy war between the Donald Trump and Boris Johnson axis against Xi Jinping didn’t affect me much, seeing as I had never owned a Huawei handset. I admit that I did find some comfort in the fact that cellphone zombies became totally bereft at the prospect of not being able to view TikTok on their little Chinese screens. All I could say to those morons was - suck it up guys, you had it coming!

In the first few hours of the Huawei denial of service attacks, the bewilderment and confusion of being unable to access social media apps soon turned to anger. This was triggered by the fact that the masses were unable to access social media apps to tell one another that they could not access social media apps. They soon realised they couldn’t remember any contact details of any of their virtual friends, or why they were virtual friends in the first place. Neither could they remember where they were, or where anything else was, or how to find their way around the real world at all. And without the Uber app they found themselves physically marooned within the perimeters of their ignorance. Deliveroo failed to respond the following day, so to avoid starvation, people who had a strong sense of smell managed to find their way to MacDonalds. But the computers were down and riots began when the Cola ran out, as slow-motion customers blamed Covid19 for the fact that China and the USA were having a software spat.

That night, the younger, more active elements of society went on the rampage and looted Tescos for pot noodles, which was a total waste of effort because the electric kettles no longer worked, thanks to smart-meter reliance on dodgy apps. Tuesday evening, after martial law and compulsory prayers, the county lines failed to supply recreational drugs to their app-driven client base, and hospitals were targeted to fill the gap in the market. Amusing video clips of the descent into chaos were not shared, not because of any sense of social responsibility but because Instagram was kaput. This added to the howling rage of the mob more than somewhat. Then, not long after the dogs began to disappear, the hunting of the weak began, and there was the smell of woodsmoke and bacon in the air. On a more positive note, a lot of overweight people slimmed down fast and learned new skills like shadow puppetry and crossbow production.

And so it was that all those predictions how civilisation would end as the result of electro-magnetic-pulse attacks turned out to be wrong. There was no need to launch missiles, zap communications or fry every electronic circuit in the land. All it took was an old man with an orange face to start a pissing contest. The irony that the old man’s preferred means of communication was Twitter is not lost on me, but then I don’t need Google Maps to tell me that we’re all up shit creek without a paddle.

And that, dear reader, is how come we all ended up on the Huawei to Hell.

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Alice Milburn - ‘Not Yours’ Single Review

04
Jul

Alice Milburn - ‘Not Yours’ Single Review

Alice Milburn continues to perfect her innovative blend of glossy jazz chords with empowering upbeat pop with the new and improved version of 2019’s ‘Not Yours’.  Alice has only just begun to expand on a variety of Jeeni’s channels, including but not limited to: jazz, pop, indie and lounge. Fresh, new talent is what powers Jeeni and with artists such as Alice, Jeeni couldn’t wish for much better fuel for our mission of uplifting and supporting unrepresented artists. Check out Alice’s young and expanding showcase on Jeeni here. On this redesign of ‘Not Yours’, Alice displays her flexible and adaptable comprehension of musicality clearer than ever. The willingness to broaden both the understanding of jazz and pop whilst also incorporating rock elements without resulting in a confusing mess of a composition is an absolute feat. Alice’s attitude to music is totally refreshing and it’s more often the attitude and approach to creation that separates the greats from the rest, not just superb musicianship.  Immediately, this re-telling of Alice’s popular 2019 single holds more atmosphere and impact than its predecessor. The guitar cuts through so much cleaner thanks to less muddy settings on both the amp and after effects during the mixing process. And this fresher, more attentive approach isn’t limited to just the guitar parts; the bass guides the harmony much more seamlessly, the drums snap harder and as a result of these perfected parts, Alice’s soulful, impassioned vocals sit in this new arrangement so much nicer. Her voice is never drowned out, overshadowed or squashed, although the guitar solo certainly takes its fair portion of the limelight, and rightly so.  Another key improvement can be found in the addition of the horn parts. Tasteful trumpets can be heard reinforcing the chords in the choruses and do so well to glimmer and shine up the composition’s instrumentation. The key difference between the 2019 version and the new 2022 version is the brightness and rejuvenation in the tone of the track and not much brightens up a mix as well as horns. A live performance where the horn parts get their own moment to solo and shine would surely be breathtaking.  It could possibly be argued that a song about a romantic betrayal shouldn’t be so bright and that maybe the first, slightly darker version is more apt for heartbreak, however this song is more empowering than it is hopeless. The title itself, ‘Not Yours’ is a triumphant announcement that Alice can’t be owned or manipulated, especially not anymore.  It’s not always easy to perhaps acknowledge that a previously released track could be realised and finished in a more polished way, however Alice is the type of artist to take that brave step in improving her sound and raising the standard of her craft up another notch. Check out more of Alice Milburn’s fantastic work here. 

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New Survey Reveals How Music Helped the UK Through Lockdown

22
Jul

New Survey Reveals How Music Helped the UK Through Lockdown

UK Music has published a new survey that reveals the crucial role music played in helping people through Covid-19 lockdowns - and how the public are craving the return of live music. The survey is the largest of its kind since the start of the coronavirus pandemic, which decimated large parts of the music industry across most of the planet in 2020. The key findings of the survey revealed: 57% of adults said music had helped them cope with lockdownAround one million adults say they have taken up an instrument during lockdown71% think music makes them more productive at work/studying Additionally, the survey reveals how the public are keen to flock back to live music and believe music helps them cope with stress and anxiety. “Music has been vital not only in helping the public cope with the impact of the Covid-19 lockdowns and improving mental health and wellbeing, but also in making people more productive while they work. Combined with the huge economic contribution the music industry made pre-Covid-19, this is further evidence that the UK music industry is a key national asset that should be protected and supported by Government. With the right support, music can continue to play a vital role in improving people’s health and wellbeing in the months ahead as we look to recover from this pandemic." Said UK Music Chief Executive Jamie Njoku-Goodwin. The findings are a huge boost to the UK music industry, which has been devastated by the ongoing impact of the Covid-19 pandemic. The sector contributed £5.8 billion to the UK economy pre-Covid-19 and supports around 200,000 jobs. Furthermore, it clearly shows how music has helped the UK through lockdown and proves the importance of the national music industry. Artists should be supported during these turbulent times, and Jeeni does that, by supporting creative talent using an ethical approach. On Jeeni, artists and creatives keep 100% of everything they earn, and thousands of performers are already on board, with an audience outreach that has grown to over two million. The growth of Jeeni has been so fast that they marked Government promises by turning to crowdfunding to expand their capacity to meet demand, raising over £46,000 in a few hours. Check out their campaign HERE and join the list of supporters and celebrities who are flocking to the cause.

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For the Love of words - why writing it out makes the best therapy.

06
Jun

For the Love of words - why writing it out makes the best therapy.

By Sammie Venn. Jeeni's Official Writer, Columnist and Blogger I have been an avid bookworm all my life. I used to read under the covers by torchlight when I was little and wake up bleary eyed but full of wonder. Delving into alternative worlds until the early hours, I would write stories and music imagining I was part of those mystical realms. Even though I was only 10 I understood the power of words. Their lyricism was captivating, and the songs I wrote became part of me, despite the fact that I could not hit a single note on key. My grandmother was an Opera singer, so my dulcet tones were put to shame, but it never stopped me belting out a melody in the shower as I grew older. Little did I know that verse would be my go-to therapy and expression of humanity in later life. Art in any form is therapeutic. Macklemore wrote that “Music moves people. It connects them in ways that no other medium can. It pulls heart strings. It acts as medicine” . Whether it is playing an instrument, reading, painting or writing, creative activity in any guise will have a positive impact on our mental health. Music is to the soul what words are to the mind, it’s all about turning a cacophony of phrases into poetic verse. I have always described it as a cathartic vent; enabling a confrontation between the most of powerful demons as well as deepest desires. Poetry is my chosen genre these days; it helps to make sense of chaotic thoughts in a non-sensical way. Iambic pentameter, rhythm and rhyme gives a structure to the subconscious and coherence to thought. David Richo author of “How to be an adult” said that “Our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful part of us - Our tears are precious, necessary, and part of what make us such endearing creatures.”  Just like a piece of music, giving your thoughts a physical shape helps them to form a new arrangement. Why not spend 10/15 minutes a day brain dumping. I always finish a liberating mind sweep with a gratitude list. It helps me to feel invigorated and more energised. Write from your heart, not your mind. Get those words down on a page, it doesn’t have to be rational, make sense to others or be the next prize winning tome. Writing therapy is about you as an individual clearing headspace for renewal and recovery. Don’t censor or perfect just let your feelings be part of a free flow process. Tune into those emotions, stay as present as you can with them and let the page hold onto them so you don’t have to. Fictionalise yourself. Create a third person version of you - I have employed this technique numerous times it is like writing for self-knowledge. The plethora of journals that sit on my bookshelves describe hope, abundance, love, passion, desire, fear and all manner of emotions in between. In understanding how I wanted to feel, I was able to get creative and fall in love with a whole new way of being. As the Beatles so appropriately said “take a sad song and make it better”. So I would like to share one of my poems with you its called “ Wild Child”.

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