Jeeni Blog

Helping the next generation of talent to build a global fanbase

Mel's bedtime story

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Mel's bedtime story

Once upon a time, I created a platform called jeeni.com which is where independent artists perform their music in front of new fans, and get rewarded for their efforts. On a Saturday night we ran a live global music festival featuring 18 acts from both sides of the Atlantic. The oldest performer was over 70, the youngest was under 10. They were brilliant, each in their own way. We broadcast over social media and websites. There were no adverts, there were no fakes, there was no hype. It didn't cost us a penny to run. Everyone had a ball. We are part of a revolutionary process that is killing a corrupt and rotting music industry which has held both audience and performer to ransom since the 1890s. So if you will indulge me, I'd like to tell you how, and why ...

I'm an old hoarder, I hoard old music recordings, and when I say old I mean really old. Upstairs, in what was once a studio but has turned into an Irish Setter leisure lounge, there are several hundred wax cylinders from the 1890s. Each cylinder is a unique recording from an age before duplication was possible. If Miss Florrie Forde wanted to sell a hundred copies of Hold Your Hand Out You Naughty Boy to her adoring public, then she had to keep lubricated and trill the bloody thing into a brass horn a hundred times and record it onto wax in real time. But to me the beauty of these cylinders is not that each one is a unique recording, but that each one is mercifully short, rotating at 120 revolutions a minute and lasting a meagre two minutes, because that's all a wax cylinder can hold. And so the two minute pop single was born. At the start of the twentieth century discs replaced cylinders, but not a lot changed. I have another room full of shellac discs that spin at 78 revolutions a minute. When it came to pop singles from artists bringing joy to the world throughout the first half of the twentieth century, they had just under three minutes to do it in. And if they were any good, just under three minutes was plenty.

I feel personally to blame for what happened next, because in the hour of my birth in 1948, the microgroove vinyl disc hit the market, spinning at what my Irish chums call dirty tree and a turd revolutions per minute. I have an entire wall of vinyl albums, with their glorious covers and sleeve notes. And yes, they are arranged in alphabetical order by artist and date-order of release. Their storage capacity is approximately twenty-five minutes a side, which is usually twenty-two minutes too long. And on the opposite wall is where all my CDs sulk, each one capable of storing seventy-four minutes of audio, and not one of them played since the turn of this century. Why? Because a hacker called SoloH went and ripped the source code of something called the Fraunhofer MP3 encoder and spread it all over the internet for free. Thanks to SoloH, I can not only digitise my entire collection of recorded music without any restrictions on playing time, I can access the entire library of everything that has ever been recorded, for ever.

My phone weighs exactly the same as my 78rpm copy of Little Richard's single Tutti Frutti, which runs for two minutes 28 seconds of total perfection. My phone holds 21,417 tracks in MP3 format, some of them complete symphonies, which are pretty good, some of them prog-rock drum solos, as used by Viet Cong torturers to break the spirit of the enemy. My desktop hard drive and cloud-accounts contain too many tracks to keep track of. I declare that my motivation for amassing this ludicrous collection of music was that one day it would bring me comfort in my old age, when my body and brain become enfeebled and I feel the need to keep hold of past pleasures while dying. As it turns out, I started playing my collection early, during lockdown, and wished I was dead by the end of day three. The singles were great, but the albums were mostly insufferable. Which is when I realised that the music album is stone dead, and the nightmare of a lifetime of audio padding is finally over. Then the real truth hit me. The recorded music industry is dead too. Thanks to COVID19 there has been an explosion of new creativity. Everyone is now a record producer, anyone can run a broadcast music channel, and that's exactly what everyone and anyone seems to be doing, including me. The spongers and leeches and shysters have been exposed as completely unnecessary, as have most of the agents, publicists and managers. They are no longer able to milk performers in our new world of social distancing, because they have lost their power. It's the remote audience that now has the power, and this audience wants instant gratification, not a load of overhyped, overwrought, overlong, flimflam.

Jeeni.com is my final project in a very long career. I'm giving my artists three minutes per track to nail it, because that's what my old hoard tells me is right. And I hope you agree that in order to shine, three minutes is all that anyone should ever need.

01
Apr

MUSIC STARS JOIN NEW TALENT TO BEAT COVID

On April 10th seventeen acts from around the world will beat the pandemic restrictions and join together to perform in a virtual festival called JAM, and they guarantee complete unknowns will get equal billing with world-famous headliners. Grammy Award nominee Barrington Levy contributes from Jamaica, in defiance of the Covid virus. Spanish youngster BlueVein will multi-track his own backing from his bedroom. Number One Billboard Dance Chart star Zeeteah Massiah will appear in her own spectacular James Bond movie sequence. Indie rocker How Mean will perform from his grandmother's house in California. Daisy Chute, the lead singer with platinum-selling supergroup All Angels, performs live from her home in London with newcomers on the other side of the world in Australia. Grammy-Award winner Skyler Jett, whose Record Of The Year with Celine Dion for Titanic is the highest-grossing movie theme of all time, will perform his latest track with complete unknowns dancing in lockdown on every continent in the world. And more artists will beam in their contributions from Detroit to Brighton, from Northern Ireland to Rhode Island. The producer of JAM is Mel Croucher, veteran founder of the UK video-games industry, and creator of the world's first million-user viral marketing campaign. Mel says, "Members of my team have made it to the top. We've been responsible for over 500 million record sales over the years, we've pioneered the online music revolution, and now we're giving something back to help unsigned independents and new talent in an industry that all but collapsed in the face of Covid. We've got Paul McCartney's Wings Over Europe double-decker bus ready to roll out as a mobile live venue, and we can't even think about using it until the crisis eases. So we've gone online. This is our third online festival, and by far the biggest. And it's absolutely free." Mel goes on to explain why it's called JAM. "The Festival is a collaboration between three organisations. The J is for my own company Jeeni, where performers showcase their talent and keep 100% of everything they make. The A is for AmplifyX, based in Los Angeles, where you invest in artists you believe in. And the M is for MultiView Media, an amazing streaming platform where fans get to be the director and control the action." The JAM Festival is at 12 noon Los Angeles time, 8pm London time on Saturday April 10th 2021, free to live stream on: https://mvm.multiviewmedia.co.uk/jamfestival For further information etc... jeeni.com amlifyx.com multiviewmedia.co.uk

05
Jun

As the Coronavirus Pandemic directly impacts Songwriters, Musicians and Artists - what can we do to help?

Reluctantly we cannot avoid a discussion about the impact of Coronavirus. Yesterday my son flew to Manilla in the Philippines where there is a state of emergency and where the community will be placed under quarantine for one month. At Jeeni HQ, key personnel have decided to self-isolate and social distance for the sake of our family, our loved ones and the business. It's all become very real, very fast. I have handpicked some relevant articles for our members, but it's a bit doom and gloom I am afraid. John Ochoa states: "By now, the detrimental effects of the global coronavirus pandemic on the music industry are loudly heard. Major festivals around the world are postponing or outright cancelling their 2020 editions. This month alone, Coachella and Stagecoach, Ultra Music Festival, SXSW, Lollapalooza Argentina, Treefort Music Fest, Brussels' Listen! Festival and several other major events were called off or postponed. The aftermath has impacted everything from music conferences and award shows—this year's Winter Music Conference, ASCAP Experience, Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards and BMI Latin Awards were all cancelled or postponed—while the amount of cancelled national and international tours continues to grow seemingly on the daily. As the coronavirus continues to spread, so too do its ramifications on the music industry. While industry experts and analysts are projecting that the live concert business could stand to lose billions, the financial fallout is virtually immeasurable at this point". http://bit.ly/2U1EH38 Norton and Denham conclude: "The coronavirus pandemic is scary for many who live on tight margins or don’t have the security of a steady paycheck. That includes independent musicians, venue owners, promoters, and others whose livelihood depends on a thriving and functioning arts and music scene". http://bit.ly/2IMuSAW The Digital Fix has started a discussion about how we can help? They say that: "We should buy physical CDs or downloads enabling artists to keep the money for themselves. and invite every band/artist to share their music with links to buy". http://bit.ly/3aW501o But is that enough, surely we can do more? What about lobbying the streaming services that pay artists peanuts. This could be the trigger to get them to offer some real help. Let's have some positive proposals from this community. Online collabouration instead of face to face rehearsals and jams? How to help our more vulnerable members get through if things get really tough? Over to you. Retro microphone on stage in restaurant. Blurred background

06
Jun

I have a confession to make.

Jeeni has returned to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “Day 5 and we have reached 98% of our 100K target". If you want to see our pitch click HERE. Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he's agreed to share his work with all our members. He's a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his website www.melcroucher.net. Here's one of Mel's latest! I have a confession to make. I have been pimping a young model, and I confess my shame. My pimping is the result of a moment of weakness. I’ve had models before, and I understand their capricious nature. One moment they are willing to perform across my desk, and the next they freeze and refuse to let me do what I want to do. But it has not been any fantasy performance that’s got me hooked, it has been the fantasy looks. I was bored. I wanted colour. I wanted make-up. I wanted dazzle and glitter. I wanted tribal tattoos, hot bubbles, glowing tubes and a whirling fan-dance. Forgive me, but I’ve pimped my computer.In 1909, Henry Ford declared, “I will build a motor car for the great multitude. It will be constructed of the best materials, by the best men to be hired, after the best designs that modern engineering can devise. And no man making a good salary will be unable to own one.” He then added his famous line, “The customer can have his car painted any colour he wants as long as it’s black.” And so they were. Painted black. When I was young, cars were still mostly black, apart from the odd spot of lipstick around the exhaust pipes of those used in suicide pacts. As for computer manufacturers, they all followed Henry Ford’s marketing strategy for half a century. Except their colour of choice was not black, but the sort of beige favoured by dead maggots. The exception was the ZX Spectrum which was black, but the keyboard really was made of dead maggots. Apart from that aberration, beige was the colour. In fact the beige box came to be used as a term of derision for desktops, implying dated, boring specifications. For example, IBM's early desktop computers were not only very beige indeed, but also very box-shaped indeed, and most PC clone manufacturers followed suit. As IBM and its imitators came to dominate the industry, beige boxes became the unquestioned norm for boring desktop computer design. Even early Apple Macs were beige boxes, until Apple took the revolutionary step in 1987 of switching to the even more boring shade of Chicken Poo By Moonlight. Not long after, equally boring videogame consoles took over the world, until there were so many revolting grey Nintendos and Segas and Playstations and Gameboys, that they had to be transported across deep space to be turned into landfill on distant moons. Meanwhile all Earthbound computers were still fifty shades of grey, until one day Apple changed everything.I remember the shock when their 1988 iMacs were launched. Suddenly we had a choice of computers that looked like see-through giant jellybabies, in a range of five neon colours called gangrene, monkeybum, impetigo, barbie and mince. And that was the end of the adult era in electronics, as a collective madness took over computer marketing. Now users are persuaded to buy machines not for what they do in the adult world, but for their infantile appearance. Users who are normally sane actually enjoy miniature coloured LEDs, winking and blinking through transparent windows like a pixie brothel. Tubes of bubbling, gaudy liquids snake their way through the computer’s guts like tapeworms on acid. Miniature spotlights illuminate cooling fans and heat-sinks from the inside out. These days a serious gamer will spend serious money on a serious PC, then corrupt the whole thing by spraying it with Plasti-Dip peelable, durable, non-slip, rubberised, multi-coloured spew. Yes, I know I shouldn’t have, but a bloke called Xephos made me do it. Let me explain further. I have been influenced by the newly popular phenomenon of celebrity PCs, where people buy a particular machine simply because their heroes favour it, endorse it or actually commission it in their name. For example one of the world’s most popular videogaming channels on YouTube is called The Yogscast. Last time I counted, it had more than seven and a half million subscribers and over six billion views, and that’s a whole lot of purchasing power. Their founder, this bloke called Xephos, got a business partner of Jeeni to create “the ultimate Yogscast PC range to live stream and play games all day.” And as the factory os not far from me, I went over to mock. But I stayed to pray, and found myself mesmerised by the bloody thing. Bloody as in bejewelled with animated red illuminations inside the see-through casing. Which is how I joined this PC pimping revolution.And even non-gamers are at it. Most regular folk, who normally wear sensible shoes and don’t indulge in bear-baiting or country music, they too have joined the pimping revolution by expressing their personal proclivities via their mobile phones. In the beginning, all mobiles were universally Henry Ford black. Now even old age pensioners wave customised casings around, all lipstick colours, sparkles and cutesy-poo creature decorations. At least, that’s what mine’s like. But I still suffer from a residual shame over my pimping habit, and like all instant gratification I feel guilty because of it. In fact while looking for a replacement machine recently, I have been quite attracted by one of those shapely models with a bit of sobriety, experience and bulk. And yes, before you ask, it’s black. Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com