Jeeni Blog

Helping the next generation of talent to build a global fanbase

Mel's bedtime story

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Mel's bedtime story

Once upon a time, I created a platform called jeeni.com which is where independent artists perform their music in front of new fans, and get rewarded for their efforts. On a Saturday night we ran a live global music festival featuring 18 acts from both sides of the Atlantic. The oldest performer was over 70, the youngest was under 10. They were brilliant, each in their own way. We broadcast over social media and websites. There were no adverts, there were no fakes, there was no hype. It didn't cost us a penny to run. Everyone had a ball. We are part of a revolutionary process that is killing a corrupt and rotting music industry which has held both audience and performer to ransom since the 1890s. So if you will indulge me, I'd like to tell you how, and why ...

I'm an old hoarder, I hoard old music recordings, and when I say old I mean really old. Upstairs, in what was once a studio but has turned into an Irish Setter leisure lounge, there are several hundred wax cylinders from the 1890s. Each cylinder is a unique recording from an age before duplication was possible. If Miss Florrie Forde wanted to sell a hundred copies of Hold Your Hand Out You Naughty Boy to her adoring public, then she had to keep lubricated and trill the bloody thing into a brass horn a hundred times and record it onto wax in real time. But to me the beauty of these cylinders is not that each one is a unique recording, but that each one is mercifully short, rotating at 120 revolutions a minute and lasting a meagre two minutes, because that's all a wax cylinder can hold. And so the two minute pop single was born. At the start of the twentieth century discs replaced cylinders, but not a lot changed. I have another room full of shellac discs that spin at 78 revolutions a minute. When it came to pop singles from artists bringing joy to the world throughout the first half of the twentieth century, they had just under three minutes to do it in. And if they were any good, just under three minutes was plenty.

I feel personally to blame for what happened next, because in the hour of my birth in 1948, the microgroove vinyl disc hit the market, spinning at what my Irish chums call dirty tree and a turd revolutions per minute. I have an entire wall of vinyl albums, with their glorious covers and sleeve notes. And yes, they are arranged in alphabetical order by artist and date-order of release. Their storage capacity is approximately twenty-five minutes a side, which is usually twenty-two minutes too long. And on the opposite wall is where all my CDs sulk, each one capable of storing seventy-four minutes of audio, and not one of them played since the turn of this century. Why? Because a hacker called SoloH went and ripped the source code of something called the Fraunhofer MP3 encoder and spread it all over the internet for free. Thanks to SoloH, I can not only digitise my entire collection of recorded music without any restrictions on playing time, I can access the entire library of everything that has ever been recorded, for ever.

My phone weighs exactly the same as my 78rpm copy of Little Richard's single Tutti Frutti, which runs for two minutes 28 seconds of total perfection. My phone holds 21,417 tracks in MP3 format, some of them complete symphonies, which are pretty good, some of them prog-rock drum solos, as used by Viet Cong torturers to break the spirit of the enemy. My desktop hard drive and cloud-accounts contain too many tracks to keep track of. I declare that my motivation for amassing this ludicrous collection of music was that one day it would bring me comfort in my old age, when my body and brain become enfeebled and I feel the need to keep hold of past pleasures while dying. As it turns out, I started playing my collection early, during lockdown, and wished I was dead by the end of day three. The singles were great, but the albums were mostly insufferable. Which is when I realised that the music album is stone dead, and the nightmare of a lifetime of audio padding is finally over. Then the real truth hit me. The recorded music industry is dead too. Thanks to COVID19 there has been an explosion of new creativity. Everyone is now a record producer, anyone can run a broadcast music channel, and that's exactly what everyone and anyone seems to be doing, including me. The spongers and leeches and shysters have been exposed as completely unnecessary, as have most of the agents, publicists and managers. They are no longer able to milk performers in our new world of social distancing, because they have lost their power. It's the remote audience that now has the power, and this audience wants instant gratification, not a load of overhyped, overwrought, overlong, flimflam.

Jeeni.com is my final project in a very long career. I'm giving my artists three minutes per track to nail it, because that's what my old hoard tells me is right. And I hope you agree that in order to shine, three minutes is all that anyone should ever need.

04
Jul

Alice Milburn - ‘Not Yours’ Single Review

Alice Milburn continues to perfect her innovative blend of glossy jazz chords with empowering upbeat pop with the new and improved version of 2019’s ‘Not Yours’.  Alice has only just begun to expand on a variety of Jeeni’s channels, including but not limited to: jazz, pop, indie and lounge. Fresh, new talent is what powers Jeeni and with artists such as Alice, Jeeni couldn’t wish for much better fuel for our mission of uplifting and supporting unrepresented artists. Check out Alice’s young and expanding showcase on Jeeni here. On this redesign of ‘Not Yours’, Alice displays her flexible and adaptable comprehension of musicality clearer than ever. The willingness to broaden both the understanding of jazz and pop whilst also incorporating rock elements without resulting in a confusing mess of a composition is an absolute feat. Alice’s attitude to music is totally refreshing and it’s more often the attitude and approach to creation that separates the greats from the rest, not just superb musicianship.  Immediately, this re-telling of Alice’s popular 2019 single holds more atmosphere and impact than its predecessor. The guitar cuts through so much cleaner thanks to less muddy settings on both the amp and after effects during the mixing process. And this fresher, more attentive approach isn’t limited to just the guitar parts; the bass guides the harmony much more seamlessly, the drums snap harder and as a result of these perfected parts, Alice’s soulful, impassioned vocals sit in this new arrangement so much nicer. Her voice is never drowned out, overshadowed or squashed, although the guitar solo certainly takes its fair portion of the limelight, and rightly so.  Another key improvement can be found in the addition of the horn parts. Tasteful trumpets can be heard reinforcing the chords in the choruses and do so well to glimmer and shine up the composition’s instrumentation. The key difference between the 2019 version and the new 2022 version is the brightness and rejuvenation in the tone of the track and not much brightens up a mix as well as horns. A live performance where the horn parts get their own moment to solo and shine would surely be breathtaking.  It could possibly be argued that a song about a romantic betrayal shouldn’t be so bright and that maybe the first, slightly darker version is more apt for heartbreak, however this song is more empowering than it is hopeless. The title itself, ‘Not Yours’ is a triumphant announcement that Alice can’t be owned or manipulated, especially not anymore.  It’s not always easy to perhaps acknowledge that a previously released track could be realised and finished in a more polished way, however Alice is the type of artist to take that brave step in improving her sound and raising the standard of her craft up another notch. Check out more of Alice Milburn’s fantastic work here. 

03
Sep

The Creator of Jeeni.

Jeeni has returned to Crowdcube to raise more funds for helping new talent. Jeeni founding director Mel Croucher says, “I admit we're ahead of our original schedule, but there's still so much more to do. We need to scale our online platform globally now and build our mass artist showcases. Then we can hit all our targets, and give our new artists the recognition they deserve.” It is day 5 today and we have raised 98% of our target £100K. If you want to see our pitch click HERE. Mel has been writing the best-loved column in top-selling tech magazines for over 30 years. Now he's agreed to share his work with all our members. He's a video games pioneer and musician, and to to find out more about Mel check out his Wikipedia page. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mel_Croucher. Here's one of Mel's latest! There was once a little Quaker boy called Charlton, who got sent off to a nice school in Oxfordshire. Charlton liked videogames very much indeed, and when he turned thirteen he became a fan of one particular game which was called Deus Ex Machina. It was hopelessly life-affirming and it allowed him to influence the plotline and outcome, just like a load of similar games. But it was also the first truly interactive movie, running in real time, with voice actors and a full music soundtrack. It came with a large monochrome poster of the face of a beautiful, innocent, yet alluring lady robot, which the boy hung on his wall. And that thought pleases me, because I was the creator of the game, and my intention was to blow the minds of children just like Charlton. Ten years later, he was no longer a Quaker schoolboy but a stroppy atheist, and he was making a living writing very naughty cartoon strips and highly scurrilous columns for a computer magazine called PC Zone. I hope his career choice was influenced by the naughty cartoon strips and scurrilous columns I was writing for the rival magazines he devoured, but I suspect he already considered me to be an old fart. Back then I believed it was my mission to take the piss out of anyone and everyone in the computer industry, and so did young Charlton. He was calling himself Charlie by then. Charlie Brooker. Today, Charlie Brooker is probably best known as the creator of the Netflix phenomenon Black Mirror. In a brilliant episode, he didn’t just nick my idea of an interactive movie where players influence the plotline and outcome, he went and did it for real. He set his episode in 1984, which was the year of my game’s release, and he hung my old poster on the wall for a touch of authenticity. And yes, he did ask permission. And yes, I was more than happy to give it to him. And no, he didn’t pay me. Brooker’s use of the branching narrative was absolutely seamless, and when the viewer-player-actor makes a choice via a mouse or remote control there is absolutely no buffering involved. And just like in my old game, if the viewer-player-actor refuses to make a choice, then the movie-game-stage makes it for them. In the future, I am sure this technique will become an active tool of the porn and ultra-violence industries, but consumers of mainstream entertainment have become more and more bone idle over the years. In fact vast numbers can’t even be bothered to select the crap entertainment they watch or play, but allow algorithms to select for them. So no, this is not the future of movies, it’s the past. Charlie Brooker didn’t predict this, and neither did I. It was predicted by Ray Bradbury in his 1953 novel Fahrenheit 451, where books have been banned because they encourage people to think, and the 1966 film of that story was one of my greatest influences. In the movie, the writer/director François Truffaut introduces us to a world in which the masses consume pap via personal screens, and believe they have choice in determining the outcome of all sorts of vacuous plotlines. They don’t, of course, and the purpose of such so-called entertainments is to pretend the people have a say in the way things are run, what choices they have, and what garbage they believe in. And here we are, more than half a century later, living in just such a society. And we don’t even need movies to condition the masses, we can use videogames. People who live-stream their gameplay are called streamers. People who watch them playing are called lost souls. Today more people watch streamers play sports simulations than watch live sport. This passive practice is ridiculously popular on streaming sites like Twitch, YouTube and a whole host of others. Even back in 2014, Twitch streams for computer games attracted more traffic than America’s leading cable and satellite network HBO, with professional streamers mashing up high-level play and banal commentary. Now they can extort big money from sponsors, subscriptions, and donations. Last year, passive viewers watched active players for more than 450 billion minutes of streamed content on Twitch alone, as the streamers jiggled and babbled while playing with themselves at FIFA 19, Monster Hunter World and all the rest. One such streamer is a charming young man called Richard Tyler Blevins, who sports attractive neon-tinted hair and goes by the name of Ninja. He has minted around ten million dollars from subscribers who pay to watch him play a game called Fortnight. Let me just make that clear – they are not paying to play Fortnite themselves, they are paying to watch Mr Ninja play. Fortnite involves a hundred players at a time who fight and butcher one other to the death until only one is left alive, all in high-definition video. There are currently 200 million players of the game. The youngest players are aged eight, which should worry their parents, but probably doesn’t because mom and pop are too busy passively watching some other streamer. The average age of a Fortnite player is 13, which is the same age as the schoolboy Charlie Brooker was when my hopelessly life-affirming game helped turn him into a potty-mouthed cynic. At least I know I succeeded in something. Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com

03
Mar

Jeeni Announces that Sharron Goodyear has joined Team Jeeni as Official Photographer.

Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com Here at Jeeni HQ, we are delighted to announce that Sharron Goodyear has joined Team Jeeni. When you see Sharron's work you will know why we are so pleased. Sharron is an Award-Winning International Photographer and Film Maker, having won Fashion & Boudoir Photographer of the Year through the Master Photographer Association, Sharron has 14 years of industry experience. Sharron specialises in working with entrepreneurs, musicians, performers and artists from around the world. Sharron's photo-shoots are VIRTUAL enabling her to work with a global client base, directly from her studio, helping us gain greater visibility on our social media as a result. Sharron is super-talented, very professional, has a real eye for positioning the camera, and has perfect attention to detail, the ideal combination of skills for Jeeni members. Sharron says: "Being a photographer is a great privilege for me and it has given me the opportunity to document so many beautiful aspects of people's life journeys. Some of these people are now great friends. I am lucky enough to say I am truly passionate about what I do. Many people hide away from having their photographs taken because they don’t feel confident in how they look in front of the camera or don’t think they are photogenic. My mission is to change that belief and I want to take the best photograph you have ever seen of yourself. The VIRTUAL sessions are incredibly good fun and very relaxed and I will give you lots of direction to help you feel at ease. At the time of booking, I will talk you through everything you need to know so there are no need for nerves – just excitement! I can take a range of photos through an IPhone connection or zoom, what ever you would prefer from the comfort of your own home anywhere in the World."   As Founding Director of Jeeni, I wanted to make sure our members are in very "good hands" so I had a VIRTUAL shoot last week in the comfort of my own home, as Sharron promised the outcome would increase my social media presence. It was amazing. I had so much fun and when I changed my profile picture on Facebook to just one of the 30 pictures Sharron took I gained 210+ likes, 134 comments and 4 shares immediately. So the "proof is in the pudding" as they say, never in 10 years has that happened!! We highly recommend that you get your VIRTUAL shoot booked NOW. Check out Sharron https://sharrongoodyear.com Click HERE to visit or return to jeeni.com